Recent Cases

Cases we work on and WIN for our client!

Welcome to the Recent Cases page at Law Offices of Podkopayeva & Piskun!  Here you gonna see the types of case we work on and WIN for clients.  We don’t be like some attorney who specialize in this or that.  We do all kind of cases, cause we know we get more money that way!

The People vs. Demochev

One of our big cases to date is that of dyke named Irina Demochev who got accuse of killing her lover by strangling her with bra!  We show court that it can’t be Ms. Demochev bra, because Ms. Demochev knockers won’t even fit in it!  Want to read court transcript on Sarah’s website? Clit here!  (Ooops, still having proofread problems!)

Oleksienko vs. Turchin

One time our client named Galechka Oleksienko was going down a street minding her own business, and a man start telling her she look like a dyke and get out of city.  So Ms. Oleksienko pull out baseball bat and hit that man.  Crack up his head pretty good, too!  Attorneys Podkopayeva and Piskun take man to court and get 98 million ruble for Ms. Oleksienko after we explain to jury that she sure she heard man say he gonna kill her with submachine gun.

Shvets vs. Belarus Public Library

This instance in attorney Piskun’s home town concern how library director prevented our client, Valya Shvets, from going in the library cause she covered with tattoos and look like she could beat people up if she wanted.  Clear case of lesbian discrimination, so we get 45 million ruble judgment for Ms. Shvets.

Pugach vs. Bondaruk Hardware Store

Attorneys at Law Offices of Podkopayeva & Piskun get judgment of 88 million ruble for client Pavla Pugach who trip outside hardware store and break ankle.  Problem is, man who run hardware store put paint bucket out on sidewalk for Ms. Pugach to trip on cause she is a lez.  Now that man got no money to buy any more paint.  Too bad!

Gerasymenko vs. Kovalevsky Publishers

Our client Aleksandra Gerasymenko is a writer of books, and she sent her new book idea to Kovalevsky Publishers.  Well, soon as the publisher found out Ms. Gerasymenko is a lesbian, they stole the book idea illegally and sell it with another name on it.  We get Ms. Gerasymenko not only 143.5 million ruble judgment but also complete works of Leo Tolstoy bound in nice leather.

Spektor vs. Donetsk Department of Water and Sewer

In attorney Podkopayeva’s home town, some sewer inspector from Department of Water and Sewer go to the house of our client Natalia Spektor to look at her sewer lines.  He find out she’s a dyke and start telling her he will charge her double unless she turn hetero sexual and start doing oral sex with him.  We get 249 million ruble judgment against City of Donetsk.  Problem is now, attorney Podkopayeva’s family can’t use indoor bathroom cause city has no money to fix sewer lines.

Shapko vs. Panasenko Light Bulb Factory

A homophobic personnel director at light bulb factory told our client Mikayla Shapko that she can’t work there no more because she’s a dyke.  Well, Ms. Shapko come straight to crack attorneys at Law Offices of Podkopayeva & Piskun and tell us all about it.  We go in court, and not only do Ms. Shapko get better job at light bulb factory, she also get company car, six weeks paid vacation and 15 million ruble.

Kuts and Drubich vs. City of Odessa, Ukraine

These two lesbians, Rayechka Kuts and Raisa Svichkar, wanted to get married, but Odessa city clerk said no way cause you both a couple of dykes.  So we go in the court and explain how Ms. Kuts and Ms. Drubich really like each other a lot, plus they pretty sure they hear marriage clerk say he will plant pipe bomb in their house if they don’t get out of his office.  The ladies are now happy married plus they get judgment of 43 million ruble that they use for honeymoon in Bahamas.

Law Offices of Podkopayeva & Piskun

We know how to get any lesbian off!

Pr. Illyitcha, 88, first floor
Donetsk, Ukraine, Russia
+38 66 317-7753
Want to send e-mail?  Clit here.  (Damn, do it again!)

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